Ah, Thursdays, and what a pleasure: another cuckoo David Brooks column to dissect. Today, Brooks presents us with a Socratic dialogue on the nature of the Iraq problem, staged between two voices: Mr. Past, and Mr. Future. Mr. Past has just finished reading an essay on Britain's occupation of Iraq by the eminent historian and thinker on nationalism and empire, Elie Kedourie. And it must be said that whatever half of Brooks's brain is impersonating Mr. Past is doing a reasonably good job of making him sympathetic.

Mr. Past: Your big problem is you don't understand the limits of what governments can achieve. Before this whole Iraq thing, you should have read Elie Kedourie's essay on the British occupation in the 1920's. This isn't history repeating itself, it's the same unbroken pattern.

Kedourie shows the whole history of Iraq is a story of "bloodshed, treason and rapine." He shows how Iraqi politics have always been marked by "murderous currents," "demonic hatreds," "grisly spectacles," Sunni violence and Shiite fanaticism. He shows naïve Westerners who thought they could change all this. He even quotes a memo from a British officer saying Britain should threaten to withdraw because then the Iraqis will be forced to behave responsibly. It's all the same!

So far, so sane. One might take issue with this argument on the grounds that it makes the same error as Robert Kaplan's "Balkan Ghosts" did a decade ago, ascribing too much of the civil war to unexplained "ancient hatreds" and not enough to the actual dynamics which create and encourage sectarian tensions in weakening modern states: competition over scarce resources, especially state-apportioned resources like government jobs or nationalized oil revenues; state failure to ensure security, provoking the establishment of sectarian militias to fill the security gap; and so forth. But it's an argument, anyway.

So then, Brooks brings in his counter-arguer, Mr. Future, who will rely on his own third-party historical narrative to describe the Iraqi adventure of the past 3 years. (Presumably we're supposed to side with Mr. Future, since he represents, you know, the future.) And what historical narrative does Mr. Future choose? Germany under the Marshall Plan, perhaps, as described by Arthur Schlesinger? Not exactly.

It's Exodus.

Mr. Future: Actually, I did read Kedourie, but last night I also reread the Exodus story. The Exodus story reminds us that human beings can transform themselves and their situations. It reminds us that people who embark on generational journeys are the realistic ones, because they are the ones who see all the possibilities the future contains.

The finest things humans have done have been achieved in an Exodus frame of mind. This country was settled and founded by people who adopted the Exodus mentality. The civil rights movement was also led by such people.

I actually had a similar experience last night, but instead of rereading Exodus, I was re-watching the Disney animated film "Mulan" with my 3-year-old daughter. And it occurred to me that while Kedourie may have his points, based on boring research in all those dusty old colonial documents and blah blah blah, "Mulan" shows that even though savage, rapacious, amoral hordes like the Huns or the Iraqi terrorists might seem to be unstoppable in the middle of the movie, the good guys will always triumph in the end because good guys believe in gender equality, and bad guys don't. (Ladies of the US Armed Forces - you go!) Actually it was my 3-year-old daughter who made this point, but I think she was dead on.

Actually, I had another thought, for a little Mr. Past - Mr. Future socratic dialogue of my own. It goes like this.

Mr. Past: I have a job with a six-figure salary at the most prestigious newspaper in the United States. All I have to do is write about 1200 words twice a week with a witty slant on current events. I don't do any research, and sometimes what I write doesn't even make sense. Ain't I the shizzum!

Mr. Future: I have what is called a blog. I write 1200 words with a witty slant on current events once or twice a day. Often, I conduct original research into these topics, and I invite others to come onto my site and either comment on what I've written or conduct original research of their own and present it. I also sometimes respond in posts to what my readers write. Most of my posts make more sense than the insane thing you wrote this morning. I do all this for free. There are thousands of me for every one of you. Why do you still have a job?