i loved and lived in mobile alabama. i moved there in 1982. my wife did not like it. i guess she was smarter than me. we eventually loved and lived on chamberlain ave at 1318. we had the best landlord to that date there his name was george drasheff, ret col. army.

back to the fireants. i had done some research on them at the library downtown mobile. and discovered that mobile is where they actually entered this country. at the city meeting it was determined that nothing should be done about it for it was not worth spending money on. or so they said.

i had a small piece of land and had about fourty mounds at the worst times. i spent a good bit of money on trying to get rid of them each month. i was working those 7 days a week 12hr plus one hour there one hour back kind of jobs. and it was a night shift. my wife had decided to take the children to see her parents in south carolina. i always told myself if i worked a full day i could have three beers, i like to belch and piss. anyway i came home family gone. oh did i mention i had to feed seven cats/kittens ours and the neighbors, they were out of town too. anyway as i was sitting there i saw all these ants on my patio. i was feeding cats drinking beer and smoking a cigarette. i began talking to these ants (they didn't say anything back) i said "i'll make a deal with you, you leave me and mine alone and i'll leave you and yours alone" i drank my beer finished smoking my cigarette and fell asleep. i quite buying the and everytime i saw these ants i would make sure i did not bother them and instructed my family to obey to treaty. for ten years i never heard of anyone of us being pissed on by these creatures. i did have some problem when i later moved to st petersburg florida. it seems some of the people i allowed to stay at my home thought it was a joke and made my ants mad and they bit me on my ring finger. i eventually had to go and have it cut open and stuffed with what looked like white cloth.

i now live in hartsville sc and when i came here i still practice my treaty obligations and have only been pissed on once. i think that is because i have had a lot of trouble here. i mean i have legal right to be here but it seems some people think i don't deserve that right. i say let's settle it in court (i have never won a case in court in my life i don't know why i still believe in it) anyway i must have done something wrong to these ants. i don't blame them i blame me.

but i have incorperated another tactic and that is to leave food for them but i piss on it. and you will not believe it but now i actually have to go a good distance (60 feet to find some) but when i spill something like peanutbutter on the floor (carpet) they are right there to clean it up and i mean everybit of it.