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Avatar Time
I am a luddite. I have no idea how where avatars come from and then made part of a person's identity. So I don't have one, and to hide my ignorance, I have pretended that I don't have one because I'm much too groovy for such insignia.
But, now that my champion is out of the race for good (even though I did write that she was toast after Indiana), and now that we have nothing to fight about (hee), it's time to throw the avatar issue into the ring.
Here's my proposal. I am asking folks, if they could spare the time, to propose an avatar for yours truly. The winner will typecast me into perpetuity and have a $50 donation made by me on their behalf to a favorite cause or charity (such as the Clinton debt-relief fund for example).
I need a judge or judges. If you would like to volunteer for that role let me know. I'm kind of leaning for someone like the kid Greg from Missouri, because he's nice. But anyone will do.
Vital Statistics:
Male
Age 48
Married (Round 2)
Jewish (who has banned himself from most discussions about Israel)
Four Kids (22, 20, 18, and 1)
New Yawker thru and thru, with time spent in midwest and the nation's capital (hee)
Big Yankee Fan (Bobby Murcer belongs in the Hall)
Union lawyer
Crotchety son of a bitch
Looks like a cross between Danny Kaye and a canteloupe
Let's play avatar. And if you don't wanna play, then so be it!
But, now that my champion is out of the race for good (even though I did write that she was toast after Indiana), and now that we have nothing to fight about (hee), it's time to throw the avatar issue into the ring.
Here's my proposal. I am asking folks, if they could spare the time, to propose an avatar for yours truly. The winner will typecast me into perpetuity and have a $50 donation made by me on their behalf to a favorite cause or charity (such as the Clinton debt-relief fund for example).
I need a judge or judges. If you would like to volunteer for that role let me know. I'm kind of leaning for someone like the kid Greg from Missouri, because he's nice. But anyone will do.
Vital Statistics:
Male
Age 48
Married (Round 2)
Jewish (who has banned himself from most discussions about Israel)
Four Kids (22, 20, 18, and 1)
New Yawker thru and thru, with time spent in midwest and the nation's capital (hee)
Big Yankee Fan (Bobby Murcer belongs in the Hall)
Union lawyer
Crotchety son of a bitch
Looks like a cross between Danny Kaye and a canteloupe
Let's play avatar. And if you don't wanna play, then so be it!
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Editor's Comments:
Second sentence should read: "I have no idea where avatars come from and then made part of a person's identity".
Also, to clarify, the contest winner picks the charity, not this disgruntled Clinton supporter. Worry not, the money will not go to the Clinton debt-relief fund if you can somehow struggle and then manage to think of something more worthy.
June 5, 2008 9:56 AM | Reply | Permalink
OK, so working on fun stereotypes of Jewish New Yorker, here's one for you:
http://www.cs.virginia.edu/~abh2n/tmp/bagel_avatar.gif
June 5, 2008 10:00 AM | Reply | Permalink
Delicious idea. We definitely need more food avatars, if only to remind us to reserve some time for sustenance in our busy blogging schedule.
June 5, 2008 11:24 AM | Reply | Permalink
I'm for the bagel idea too.
Either that, or a pair of matzah balls.
June 5, 2008 9:38 PM | Reply | Permalink
Or, here, if you're more Luddite than Jew ...
http://washingtonpolicyblog.typepad.com/washington_policy_center_/images/2008/03/05/luddite.png
http://burningscouts.spancer.com/handbook/Images/badges/ludditeTN.jpg
http://jonathantower.files.wordpress.com/2008/02/luddite.jpg
http://phillips.blogs.com/goc/luddite.jpg
The closest thing to a cross between Danny Kaye and a melon is here:
http://www.angelfire.com/film/dannykaye/DannyKaye_BigTopAlbum.jpg
June 5, 2008 10:20 AM | Reply | Permalink
Thanks Chino. Love the luddite options, especially the first one. I don't think the Danny Kaye/melon thingie shows up but I can just imagine. :)
June 5, 2008 10:27 AM | Reply | Permalink
Sounds like fun :)
I'm still thinking, but here's an initial suggestion:
http://www.newhampshire.com/doclib/celebrity/salinger.jpg
June 5, 2008 10:20 AM | Reply | Permalink
Salinger?? Do tell why!
June 5, 2008 10:25 AM | Reply | Permalink
Great start Ben. So far you're the judge, jury and plaintiff. I do love a good bagel, but I'm at the point in my life where I have to scoop out the inside first to save on calories.
By the way, I do have a real story about bagels and the economy. This past Sunday morning we had some elderly cousins of my Dad's over for brunch. Of course, typical Jewish reality, we told them to come at 10:30 and they showed up at 10 and they were famished. I explained to my wife that elderly Jewish folks don't do brunch and they like to eat breakfast no later than 7 a.m. (even on Sunday). They also like stuff like pickled herring in cream sauce, a half a pound of which I had dutifully purchased on Saturday evening (try it, you'll like it).
In any event, before they arrived that morning, I stuck the baby in the stroller and we walked to 81st and Broadway where the famous H&H Bagels is (I don't think they're that good but that's another story). I had the person give me an assorted dozen, and then she rang me up and announced that I owed $15.60. The thing is that I only brought 15 dollars with me, thinking that I would get the bagels and then maybe stop off for a coffee to go somewhere. Honestly, I had no idea that bagels had shot up so much in price.
Of course, the cashier felt sorry for me because I had a bunch of impatient folks behind me and I had the baby, so she let me go. But, can you believe the price of bagels these days? We have have real problems according to the bagel meter.
June 5, 2008 10:21 AM | Reply | Permalink
That sounds suspiciously like kvetching to me. ;)
Hey, if you want any of the other images resized to the necessary width or auto-leveled, etc., I'm your guy. I love using GIMP!
June 5, 2008 10:27 AM | Reply | Permalink
Thanks Ben. Much obliged. What's a GIMP? LOL
June 5, 2008 10:28 AM | Reply | Permalink
GIMP is the free and open source answer to Photoshop. If one's using Linux, it's definitely the way to go.
June 5, 2008 10:30 AM | Reply | Permalink
GIMP = GNU Image Manipulation Program, for those wondering about the acronym.
GNU = GNU's Not Unix, for those wondering about that (recursive) acronym.
June 5, 2008 10:32 AM | Reply | Permalink
Gee thanks, much clearer now!
June 5, 2008 10:36 AM | Reply | Permalink
The operating system should be called GNU/Linux. Linux is just the kernel.
- RMS
(I kid, but only because I love. Power to the Penguin!)
June 6, 2008 7:20 AM | Reply | Permalink
I go with your Danny Kaye reference:
http://simplyclassics.net/coppermine/albums/danny%20kaye/normal_50458035_10.jpg
June 5, 2008 10:28 AM | Reply | Permalink
I'll get around to it one of these days, but I really don't like them very much. They seem somehow to be an invasion of privacy and anonymity.
I'm from rural southern Ohio we don't know from bagels. The guy who rents the vacant lot next to the gas station every summer and sets up a fish fry shack has increased his prices by 50 cents, but your fried fish fillet on soft white bread with your choice of Miracle Whip or Mayonaise can be offset by picking up a can of offbrand pop at the gas station instead of a cold coke from the iced tub on the shaded side of the truck. And for Christ's sake kids, stop leaving the empty pop cans on the picnic table it attracts the sweat bees.
June 5, 2008 10:45 AM | Reply | Permalink
making me hungry...
June 5, 2008 11:06 AM | Reply | Permalink
And he's one of the most talented cursers I've ever heard.
June 5, 2008 11:33 AM | Reply | Permalink
White Bread?
Mayo? That's French, right?
Hey Bev, you wanna judge? Heck I even trust you. :)
June 5, 2008 11:08 AM | Reply | Permalink
Sure, I'll judge - do I get to choose the charity? My son's unit has a family readiness group which has a fund that pays for home/car repair for families whose dad/husband/father is deployed - you've never seen people so grateful for a donation.
June 5, 2008 11:18 AM | Reply | Permalink
Heck, that's perfect Bev, I mean Judge Bev. It'll be my pleasure. The wife of the president of my principal client is very involved with a similar group of marine parents on Long Island (there son just finished two tours). Wonderful cause, and I will be honored to contribute to it on your behalf.
June 5, 2008 11:21 AM | Reply | Permalink
Here you go, BevD, one designed especially for you with your fried fish fillet and can of pop.
http://www.cs.virginia.edu/~abh2n/tmp/meal_avatar.gif
June 5, 2008 11:21 AM | Reply | Permalink
I might go for that one, Ben.
June 5, 2008 11:34 AM | Reply | Permalink
Harpo?
June 5, 2008 10:53 AM | Reply | Permalink
Bobby Mercer in the Hall? why? Who is next Yankee fan. Graig Nettles?
June 5, 2008 11:04 AM | Reply | Permalink
You gotta problem with Nettles? But, hey, remember Bobby Murcer batted second in the '71 series in old Tiger Stadium. And he got a single up the middle in his first at bat. Doesn't that qualify him for the Hall?
June 5, 2008 11:07 AM | Reply | Permalink
That is, the '71 all-star game; Yankees weren't near the series in '71.
June 5, 2008 11:10 AM | Reply | Permalink
And won't be this year either :)
June 5, 2008 11:28 AM | Reply | Permalink
How about a Murcer pic for your avatar:
http://www.bobbymurcer.com/Web_Gallery/fmt_i0012.jpg
June 5, 2008 11:27 AM | Reply | Permalink
Nice, and see even then Bobby was a peacenik. By the way, Bobby is recovering from brain surgery for a cancerous tumor. He's my guy.
June 5, 2008 11:32 AM | Reply | Permalink
No problem with Nettles, Just with Yankee fan wanting everyone in pinstripes to be in the hall. I can hear the calls from Chris Chambliss and Mickey Rivers coming now!
June 5, 2008 11:28 AM | Reply | Permalink
Good ears! Remember, Game 5, 76 playoffs, Yankees and Royals. Bottom of the ninth, Chambliss leading off, and BOOM! Hall of Fame shot.
June 5, 2008 11:31 AM | Reply | Permalink
Horace Clark?
Oscar Gamble?
Best yet: RON BLOOMBERG!
http://www.yankeetradition.com/bloomberg.JPG
June 5, 2008 11:02 PM | Reply | Permalink
Ron Blomberg was the first major league player to appear as a DH, back in 1973.
Oscar Gamble had a great afro back in the '70s, and this wonderful quote:
"When I step into the batter's box, I am in scoring position."
June 6, 2008 7:26 AM | Reply | Permalink
Go classic bslev:
http://tinyurl.com/3d4c2l
June 5, 2008 12:25 PM | Reply | Permalink
The Babe! Nice. He was a Clinton supporter clearthinker, did you know that?
June 5, 2008 12:33 PM | Reply | Permalink
Hey, it's your avatar... you have to be happy with it.
If I win, I'll let you know where to send the $50. Now, judge on the basis of the avatar, only.
Right? ;-)
June 5, 2008 1:27 PM | Reply | Permalink
You mean rulez are rulez? Asking alot clearthinker.
June 5, 2008 1:36 PM | Reply | Permalink
I know. Especially from a Hillary supporter... ;-)
June 5, 2008 7:40 PM | Reply | Permalink
Nice one. Can someone find a way to morph The Babe into Joba Chamberlin? That would be a kickass avatar.
June 6, 2008 9:11 AM | Reply | Permalink
They do kinda look alike, dontcha think?
June 6, 2008 11:05 AM | Reply | Permalink
Since you claim to favor the Union, an assertion of dubious truthfulness given your sudden adherence to the dogmas of the charlatan Obama, you should select an avatar such as a portrait of General Sherman. He is as popular in Georgia as that tribune of sneering youth ever shall be. Bah!
June 5, 2008 1:00 PM | Reply | Permalink
I know who you are crankypants. You can't fool me mister/ms/or whatever. And you made me cranky. Alas, the good general is now in the ring. But, you know, if nominated, shall I wear his avatar if he still says no, no, no after all of these years?
June 5, 2008 1:04 PM | Reply | Permalink
Well, the clock is ticking and if this doesn't get recommended some more, I think we are left with the entries submitted thus far. Bev D is the judge and, in her honor, in addition to the 50 bucks for the winning avatar, I will also donate another $50 to the organization she referenced above that is helping the families of soldiers in Iraq. Get those submissions in folks!
June 5, 2008 1:47 PM | Reply | Permalink
Heck I can't believe this made it to the big board. Well this is for a good cause folks. I'm in Judge Bev D's hands; the avatar she picks is the one I don. Now's your chance to get me back for all those things I've written folks. :) My avatar, my identity, is out of my control and in your hands.
By the way, as stated, the winner gets to pick where I send my donation, and Bev D also gets a matching donation to her worthy "family readiness" group in Ohio, which assists military families with sons and daughters and spouses in Iraq. Hey Bev, why don't you print the name of the organization, and maybe we can get a couple of more dollars sent there from the good folks at TPM.
June 5, 2008 8:47 PM | Reply | Permalink
As a fellow luddette, I am seriously contemplating donating my personal choice (for myself) of an avatar to you although you may not appreciate a picture of Laurie Mylroie as a stand-in.
Getting real, how about a pic of Mel Brooks at the appropriate age?
I would request that you donate $50 to one of the schools in Oregon the Clinton campaign has stiffed.
This one, as the debt is over 60 days in arrears, would be my choice:
"$1,384
OWED TO: Bend-La Pine School District
WHAT FOR: Bill spoke March 20 to about 2,500 people in the Bend Senior High School gym, where he joked that he’d offered to wash local Democratic superdelegate Wayne Kinney’s car windows. (Kinney later endorsed Obama.)
WHAT IT WOULD BUY: Gas for 51 school buses from Bend to Mount Bachelor and back."
http://wweek.com/editorial/3430/11055/
June 5, 2008 9:58 PM | Reply | Permalink
lally:
An excellent cause indeed. I would expect nothing less from you. Always a pleasure, sort of. :)
June 5, 2008 10:16 PM | Reply | Permalink
Ooops. That's my wife. What she said though lally. She signed in to TPM and is prepared to propose my nose as the avatar. I have no additional comment.
June 5, 2008 10:23 PM | Reply | Permalink
Thanks abster, I think.
;>}
and Bruce, did the abster give you leave to out her as your wife? I'm sure that you are relieved that she didn't provide a pic of your nose altho Bev would never....er...pick it.
June 7, 2008 5:07 PM | Reply | Permalink
How about this one:
http://cache.boston.com/bonzai-fba/Globe_Photo/2006/10/24/1161724461_2019.jpg
June 5, 2008 10:31 PM | Reply | Permalink
All the hockey mojo you'll ever need:
http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3189/2554469277_9c5d042c4f_t.jpg
June 5, 2008 10:37 PM | Reply | Permalink
Bruce:
http://www.afi.com/Images/tvevents/laa/archive/gal_Fonda_Henry_3.jpg
:)
June 5, 2008 11:23 PM | Reply | Permalink
Er, Ceci n’est pas Henry Fonda
It's Tom Joad.
June 5, 2008 11:26 PM | Reply | Permalink
Hey bug:
Tom Joad is my guy! And you know that he's always going to be there, right?
:)
June 6, 2008 9:48 AM | Reply | Permalink
It's a really good one, man. But what a responsibility.
June 6, 2008 9:56 AM | Reply | Permalink
He led me.
June 6, 2008 12:11 PM | Reply | Permalink
Here's one of my favorites. I could never live up to it, but I think you can.
http://work.colum.edu/wordpress/briley/files/2007/11/murrow.jpg
June 6, 2008 9:58 AM | Reply | Permalink
I think you could live up to him actually, but I don't think I have a stable enough demeanor, and I quit smoking. The other problem is that I don't want to be compared with Keith Olbermann, who seeks to compare himself without any rational basis to the great Mr. Murrow.
June 6, 2008 12:10 PM | Reply | Permalink
I am having a hard time here. Two posts swallowed with the cryptic message that they are being held by the blog owner. What does this mean? Am I going to be charged? I thought they were of age.
June 5, 2008 11:47 PM | Reply | Permalink
I will take them one at a time.
First, I have always wanted a Shelley Winter avatar:
http://www.observer.com/files/imagecache/article-teaser/files/082905_article_doonan.jpg
June 5, 2008 11:48 PM | Reply | Permalink
Second, I am reminded of this guy, also from the Poseidon Adventure:
http://blogs.warwick.ac.uk/images/ccarter/2004/10/22/borgnine.jpg
June 5, 2008 11:50 PM | Reply | Permalink
Third, if you're looking to impress the ladies:
http://img.timeinc.net/people/i/2006/specials/sma06/blog/061120/paul_newman_320.jpg
June 5, 2008 11:55 PM | Reply | Permalink
Too many links....
Moderation is the key to success
-workerbee's mom
June 6, 2008 12:09 AM | Reply | Permalink
You mean a moderated forum, right? ;-)
June 6, 2008 7:32 AM | Reply | Permalink
From your lips to god's ears.
June 6, 2008 9:48 AM | Reply | Permalink
Fourth, I don't care about the NRA, this kicks ass:
http://www.templeton-cambridge.org/fellows/grossman/publications/2007.03.07/americans_get_an_f_in_religion/img/charlton_heston_plays_moses.jpg
And let's not forget Ron Bloomberg upthread.
June 5, 2008 11:57 PM | Reply | Permalink
Armchair:
You have outdone yourself with recommendations and I am flattered. Either that or your like the folks I see at the 7-11 buying 30 Lotto Jackpot tickets! Much obliged, and it's in BevD's hands so I hope you've been nice to her.
June 6, 2008 11:15 AM | Reply | Permalink
"you're". It's contagious around here.
June 6, 2008 12:13 PM | Reply | Permalink
Baseball ones have already been suggested. How about something from the crotchety aka disgruntled variety.
http://ccinsider.comedycentral.com/photos/uncategorized/2007/10/11/bruce.jpg
June 6, 2008 2:16 AM | Reply | Permalink
I like the simplicity of this one to the "Bobby Murcer" theme:
Murcer autographed ball
It's too big for an avatar, but if you don't feel confident about reducing it down yourself, I'd be happy to do it for you.
June 6, 2008 8:26 AM | Reply | Permalink
Thank you. That's very kind, and this luddite will definitely need help with whatever avatar is chosen for him. No joke: I didn't even know what an avatar was until TPM changed the software in the beginning of the year.
June 6, 2008 11:03 AM | Reply | Permalink
Danny Kaye with glasses photo shopped in.
June 6, 2008 8:51 AM | Reply | Permalink
Mrs. No Pic. You remind me of someone I once knew.
June 6, 2008 1:42 PM | Reply | Permalink
Someone old, someone new, someone snarky, someone blue
June 7, 2008 8:24 AM | Reply | Permalink
You have a good ear, beach girl.
June 8, 2008 7:45 AM | Reply | Permalink
Well, well. Many great options. This is off the big board, but thanks to all. I'm going to ask Bev, if she sees this, to wait until Sunday or Monday to make her choice (to allow anyone else wants to throw a proposal into the ring). Bev, hopefully you'll see this and let me know somehow what your selection is. I'll repost with my decision and announce the winning charities, etc., etc., etc. Many thanks to all.
June 6, 2008 9:46 AM | Reply | Permalink
Here's a question bslev. Are you going to keep your voice, or adopt the voice of your avatar? If the former, we have to find one that fits your voice. If the latter, you have to make a commitment to stay in character. Or I'll have to run you and your new avatar off.
June 6, 2008 9:51 AM | Reply | Permalink
I will keep my voice Billy, silent Rs and all, but I will need to hear from you if you sense I am beginning to run astray. You must continue to guide folks like me, and don't just go running me off without giving me a couple of chances man. In the meantime, please help by proposing a fitting avatar, and like any advocate, be mindful of who the judge is.
June 6, 2008 11:00 AM | Reply | Permalink
Just use your own photo.
June 6, 2008 8:55 PM | Reply | Permalink
I have to go with Tom Joad from Worker Bee. It's a beautiful photo and perfect for a union lawyer.
The Family Ready Group will appreciate this more than you can imagine
FRG, Attn Mrs. Wells
478Th En. Bn.
75 Carmel Manor Dr
Ft. Thomas, KY 41075 2393
This was fun Bruce, enjoyed it!
June 7, 2008 9:53 AM | Reply | Permalink
Oh my!
Well, if you decide to use it, Bruce, I went and sized it and tweaked it for you.
Here's how you upload it:
1. Go here:
http://img379.imageshack.us/img379/4475/bslevtomjoaddc3.jpg
And download the resized image to your computer to a place you remember. I think you shift click on the image and say "save image as" but I have a mac, so it may be a bit different for you.
2. Click on the word "(EDIT)" next to the words "MY PROFILE" under the TPM masthead.
3. Scoll down until you find The words: "Photo (max 64 pixels wide):" and hit the "browse" button.
4. Locate the file you just downloaded, and click on "open"
5. Hit save.
Three or four tries ought to do it.
:)
Sometimes you have to clear the cookies in your browser from this site before you see it.
Good luck.
As for my charity of choice, I can't imagine a more worthy one than Bev's, but feel free to buy me a virtual beer here:
http://my.barackobama.com/page/outreach/view/main/TPMObamaBeer
:D
If Mrs. Bruce is looking for an Avatar, I'd suggest one of the women saints, although you are Jewish, somehow it would seem appropriate to me. I'll be happy to forward some suggestions.
Heh.
June 8, 2008 11:58 PM | Reply | Permalink
Thank you Bev, and congratulations Bug! And thanks to all who participated. I will attempt the avatar installation this evening, and will endeavor to live up to the high standards set by Mr. Joad (and his author of course).
Bug, your choice of Bev's charity is both gracious and an example for the community. I am happy to contribute on behalf of both of you. What do I say on the card, however? This is on behalf of BevD and the Workerbee (aka bug) from TPM. They'll think I'm nuts! :)
June 9, 2008 7:07 AM | Reply | Permalink