It would be nice to have a guy who could share the secret of how to stop makeup from caking. - M. Dowd, May 28, 2000
The best ex-president who was never president could make one of the most interesting campaigns in American history even more interesting. -M. Dowd, February 28, 2007
I doubt that my favorite sharp tongued political satirist/columnist has changed much in the last seven years; Maureen Dowd and taxes are but a few guarantees in life. I believe the change was what side of the looking-glass the Goracle was standing on. There is the side of celebrity where every good deed is rewarded with an award; and then there is the other side of the looking-glass where a broad laugh, good hair, and who headlines your gospel hour is more defining than the candidates 50-years of combined public service.
Oh, Oprah, you are in for a world of hurt! Already the Edwards campaign has used some North Carolinian female black leaders to suggest that her impact is slight since she hasnt built a school in the state; a clever, yet veiled, swipe at Oprahs recent child abuse woes at her school for young women in South Africa. The Clinton camp brought out the three generations of Rodham girls with the unveiling of the long awaited Chelsea v.2007. Some Clinton supporters (not affiliated with the campaign, of course) even whispered about the Os support, even advocacy, of the Iraq War back in 2001-2002. And this is only the beginning. In no time the campaign embedded press will grow tired of the repetitive stump speech and start looking for process stories on the tour. How the carefully lighted superstar will fair is anyones guess, but the safe money is on not too well. I am sure Matt Drudge is just waiting for that call from thesmokinggun.com when theyve unearthed Miss Winfreys travel rider.
If the Oh-ohwo-ah-Oprah werent enough to take Obama over the top, word has it that Will Smith is being polished up to close the deal. The Cosby-heir-apparent will take some time off from his $25M gigs to join O in his support of o. His bono fides are impeccable: A successful marriage (in Hollywood, no less), a family-man, a former rap star who never glorified gun violence and never strayed far from funny sneakers and hand-me-downs as the objects of his rap, and an American hero (he saved the world no less than four times from extraterrestrial extermination with bravado and charm).
The Edward and Clinton responses to Will Smiths endorsement of o is the most guarded secret in the campaign. My sources tell me that a whispering campaign is in the works that draws light to the lack of honesty in the Fresh Princes weekly stratagems in the mid-90s (Clinton), and a snarky reference to the health consequences of the cigar Mr. Smith smoked in the climatic scene of Independence Day (Edwards); which has the added benefit of bringing up cigars, a verboten topic in the Clinton camp. Mr. Smith should strap himself in for a bumpy ride. If he thought attacking robots were relentless, just wait til the press corp grows bored of his prepared remarks.
You can forget your positive social message in your rap, your bookclub success, your charming sense of humor, or televised empathy when you cross over to the other side of the looking glass of politics. If Al Gore showed us anything, its that your positive contributions only remain an asset when you are NOT running for public office. My dear Maureen Dowd reflects her view of the society, she does not create it.